Did I Ever Feel Like Giving Up on My Single Mom by Choice Journey?

I would be lying if I said this journey was not overwhelming. Oh my God, it was overwhelming in every possible way. Financially. Emotionally. Physically. Between the countless appointments, the daily routines with medicine, and the reality of giving myself injections, it sometimes felt like too much. But here is the truth. I never, ever, ever thought about quitting.

The Physical and Emotional Toll

This path tested me in ways I did not expect. Between the hormone treatments, the injections, and the way my body reacted to it all, there were times I just did not feel like myself. Some days, I would look at my stomach and see how bruised and bloody it looked. On those days, I’d take a deep breath and remind myself why I was doing this. One time it looked so bad I even sent a picture to my family, and my brother joked “Did you get shot?” I laughed and sarcastically replied, “Yes, I did, and I’m taking a selfie.”

Emotionally, it was intense too. Some days were filled with excitement and anticipation. Other days, I just felt worn out. That is normal when you are juggling so much. But one thing I never felt was doubt about the journey. I knew in my heart I was meant to be a mom, and that certainty helped me through every phase.

The Financial Side of the Journey

Becoming a single mom by choice also meant making big financial decisions. Fertility treatments are not cheap, and I had to be very intentional about preparing for the costs. Even with my financial planning, there were moments when my breathing room got tight. I could see areas where I could’ve done even better, but keep in mind, I’m a CPA, so my standards are probably higher than most! I just want to keep it real: even with solid planning, there will be challenges, but it’s still completely doable. I’m grateful I planned ahead, because when unexpected expenses came up, I was able to stay grounded and focused on what mattered most. That preparation gave me peace of mind and allowed me to fully embrace the process, knowing I had made space for this dream to become reality.

Why Quitting Was Never an Option

From the very beginning, I was sure. I wanted to be a mom more than anything else, and that desire gave me all the motivation I needed to keep going. The tough parts, whether physical, emotional, or financial, were just temporary. Motherhood was forever.

I also had a moment that made everything feel even more certain. One afternoon, while I was half asleep on the sofa, I heard the soft sound of tiny hands and knees moving across the floor. It felt so real that when I woke up, I actually looked around, wondering where my baby was. That moment changed everything for me. I knew she was waiting for me, and from that day on, there was no turning back.

That moment, and everything that came after, taught me so much about who I was becoming. I realized that this journey was preparing me for life as a mom. Learning how to adapt, how to keep moving forward when things felt difficult, and how to stay focused on the bigger picture were all skills I knew I would need later. Looking back, I can see that those experiences helped shape the kind of mother I am today.

If you want to read the full story about that experience, check out my blog post, “Why I Chose to Become a Single Mom by Choice.”

The Role of Support Systems

Even though I chose to walk this path on my own, I was not truly alone. I had people in my life who encouraged me and reminded me that I could do this. Their words and their presence made the process easier. If you are going through this and you do not have a big circle, that is okay too. Support can come in many forms. It could be a close friend, an online community, or even a counselor who listens and helps you process your feelings. Having encouragement along the way makes a real difference.

Mindset That Helped Me Keep Going

One thing that made this journey less overwhelming was the way I approached it in my mind. I reminded myself that every challenge was temporary. The injections would end. The appointments would eventually slow down. Even the exhaustion of pregnancy would not last forever. Instead of getting stuck on the hard parts, I focused on what was waiting for me at the end. My baby. My dream of motherhood. That perspective helped me push through and stay steady, even on the rough days.

Encouragement for Future Single Moms by Choice

If you are thinking about becoming a single mom by choice, here is my advice. If you are just dreaming, start gathering information. Learn about the process, research clinics, and hear stories from women who have already walked this path. If you are deciding, give yourself space to think it through, but do not let fear be the thing that stops you. Ask yourself what you want most and be honest with your answer. If you are already in the middle of it all, remember that feeling emotional is normal. Feeling tired is normal. None of those feelings mean you cannot do it. You can, and you will.

A Message From My Heart

I never once thought about giving up. I knew every shot, every appointment, and every dollar spent was leading me closer to my daughter. And now that she is here, I can tell you with complete confidence that it was all worth it.

If you are somewhere on the path to becoming a Single Mom by Choice, whether you are dreaming about it, weighing the decision, or already deep in the details, I would love to connect.

We can talk through anything—from donor selection and IVF to emotional preparation, logistics, and even finances, since I am a CPA too. Wherever you are in your journey, I am here to help. Got questions? Book an “Ask Me Anything” session using this link. Let’s make your next step feel a little easier.